How can Bill Fitzhugh of Family Church ignore his son from another marriage?
My name is Greg Roberts, and I'm the son of Pastor Bill Fitzhugh, Family Church in Whitehall, Arkansas.
He was married to my mother, Sandra Gail Davis (maiden name). They were divorced when I was between 1 and 2 years old. I never new my dad, as he has never made an attempt in my adult years to contact me.
I finally decided to try and contact him in 2008. My sister first made contact with him and provided his cellphone number.
I decided to make the phone call, as I just wanted to know who he was and maybe we might be able to have some kind of relationship. As I now know, that will never happen. He isn't willing to do the right thing.
Dad, I just want to know how on earth can you turn your back on your flesh and blood son? How can you possibly lay your head down every night, when you know you should have had some kind of relationship with me?
I made this phone call about a year ago. Since then, I have waited throught each holiday- Thanksgiving, Christmas, Birthday, and not so much as an email, letter, etc....... Clearly, you have no intention of ever being my dad. I can't tell you how painful that is for me to think, let alone write!
During the one and only phone conversation I had with him, he said he made a promise to my mother, that he would never contact me. That is no excuse.
My mother passed away a few years ago, and he still made no attempt.
Even though he could have easily contacted my grandparents, who lived just down the road on dollarway. They were only 3-4 miles from Family Church.
I just can't understand how anyone can deny to have a relationship with their children. But you are the Pastor of Family Church. You are held to an even higher standard.
How can you possibly stand in front of your church members. I've thought many times about attending the church, just to see how you and the members would react, when I look so much like you. I have been told by others that I look like their Pastor. When I ask them where they go to church, they respond with Family Church.
If you only knew how many times I have passed by Family Church, on my way to visit with my grandparents. Wondering why on earth doesn't he want to be my dad?
During our only phone conversation you said that you were a different person back then. Unfortunately for me, it seems you are still the same.
If I don't know who you are, then I wonder if the church really knows you.
I hope you eventually come clean and do the right thing. For me, yourself, and the church.
I wish you well.
Your Son,
Greg Roberts
If you have a similar situation, I would love to talk with you about it.
Please feel free to leave a comment. Please, no foul language.
TO: GREG ROBERTS: GREG YOU KNOW ME AND WE HAVE BEEN TOGETHER WHEN YOU WERE INSTALLING SATALITE DISHES IN SHERIDAN AROUND 1996--I SHOWED YOU PICTURES OF YOUR FATHER AND OFFERED TO INTRODUCE YOU AND EVEN INVITED YOU TO GO TO HIS CHURCH AND SIT THROUGH CHURCH SO YOU COULD SEE AND LISTEN TO HIM PREACH . PHONE CALL AND LETTERS ARE NOT GOING TO DO ANY GOOD , I CAN ASURE YOU HE DOES NOT READ OR INTERACT WITH ANYONE THE INTERNET NO MATTER WHO YOU ARE. I WAS HIS BEST FRIEND THROUGH IT ALL AND HE WILL NOT TALK TO ME ON A COMPUTER.. A LOT OF THINGS HAVE CHANGE SINCE I SAW YOU.. I AM RETIRED COMPLETELY AND HAD SOME SERIOUS HEALTH ISSUES.. I WOULD LOVE TO TALK TO YOU AGAIN...ON FACEBOOK MY PAGE IS IS UNDER B.J. JOHNSON...MY EMAIL IS ret_asptrooper475 @YAHOO.COM...MY CELL IS 870-550-0732...I HAVE THOUGHT OF YOU OFTER GREG...NOW IT'S YOUR TURN TO CONTACT ME....BJ
ReplyDeleteHello BJ. I do remember talking with a local police officer one night and when I gave my last name, he asked if I knew Freddie Roberts from ASP. He told me about good times serving with freddie.
ReplyDeleteI don't remember pictures or discussing Bill and his church though. Then again, that was a long time ago.
I visited your facebook page to see if a photo would refresh my memory, but only found a ASP badge photo.
Im sorry to hear about your health issues, and can relate to some degree as I get older as well.
BJ, I sincerely appreciate you contacting me on this blog and hope you will accept my apology for not responding in 2011. I no longer use the email I started the blog with due to spam, and just didn't bother to check for comments last year on the page.
Yet, here I am again in 2012. It's just something that never goes away and whether we like it or not effects our everyday lives to some degree, even if we don't realize it.
What really saddens me is knowing that you know Bill Fitzhugh better than I do. I have thought probably thousands of times about attending Family Church in WhiteHall but just couldn't do it for a number of reasons.
Without a doubt, people would immediately recognize how much I look like him and wouldn't want to draw attention to myself. I would only want to see and hear him to get some idea of who he is.
In the end I don't feel that god's house is the proper place for this. It is my belief in the lord above that has kept me away literally thousands of times. But also for those families who go there to celebrate and worship his name.
I reached out to Bill years after mom passed away, and he has made no effort since then to reach me. Unfortunately, I still feel today as I did when starting this blog.
He could easily contact me and get to know one another, but chooses not to. I still today want nothing more than to know my real father. I can't make him want a relationship with his son and feel that one of us will pass away in the years ahead, never again having the chance to know each other.
I started this blog after losing all hope that we would ever reunite and realizing how wrong it is, regardless of the reason.
Today, while I believe in god, I don't believe in those who go to church, claiming to be christians on sunday, and then live like they have never been to worship. Being a christian isn't a part-time spur of the moment idea. It is a way of life!
There is no "grey" area here. No excuses, no exemptions. It's a choice, make it or not, but don't pretend to be something your not.
Yes, we all make mistakes but it's no longer a mistake when you keep repeating the same scenario over and over.
BJ, unfortunately Bill is using the promise to my mom as his reason for not contacting me.
DeleteI know my mother, and she would be so upset with him to know that after her passing away he still can't do the right thing.
Bill, forget about me, you also have a daughter Tammy that you needs you more than I do. I know you talked to her and told her that you weren't sure if she was yours or not.
She even showed up at your door years ago and you threw her out like trash.
You know as well as I do that she looks just like you too.
Prove your not her father with a blood test. But your not about to do that because you already know the truth, just as I do.
I feel anger surfacing again, so I will sign off now.
I was thinking of attending Family Church as I am looking for a new church home, but after seeing this, I think not. If your earthly father can't be accepting as the heavenly Father he is preaching about, he doesn't need to be in the pulpit preaching. That's hypocrisy.
ReplyDeleteRRM
Just curious without a dog in the race. However, I know a few of those mentioned since we are the same age and same vicinty. Here is my questions: Did Billy pay child support from his marriage and two children he / she had together? Was his marriage to your mother common law are that gained via nuptial means of a marriage license? What years were they married since he and I graduated the same year? I also knew Peggy who is at least one year younger or maybe two than Billy and I? Was Billy in the military during his / your mother's marriage? How old was Sandra when Billy and she married? Did he / her have two or three children which I count when reading your letter? If you choose to reply that is good to settle my curosity with three folks I knew well. I admit, it is none of my business and quite frankly surprised to learn that as I read authored by you, sir. As for me, I no longer live in the state of AR but come that way to visit my parents grave site and brothers buried in White Hall. I have nothing to hide and if you wish my name just email me and I will provide that to you. I am 75 years and a Christian for the past 23 years. When I knew Billy / Peggy they were just like me and NOT Christians. I am happy to learn of their salvation and serving Jesus. I wish you well, sir.
ReplyDelete